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Let's get the important stuff out of the way first.
So a detective is investigating the disappearance of his wife.
The cover has two women kissing each other with real boyfriends sex their faces bathed in a blue light.
You can't destroy Hollywood Phoebe.James Bond would be impressed, if not embarrassed by the amount of hot women Steele hangs around with in one movie.There should have been a little more effort made to keep "Doom" from falling headfirst into B-movie oblivion.She hangs out with other ladies of the night and tries to earn some money.The house is run by a priest who likes to give out spankings to the misbehaving delinquents and Sister Woronov who applies her own demonic discipline to the unruly ladies.Gross humor abounds, but most of it falls completely flat.There's just something about a woman insisting in bathing in blood that speaks.The universally familiar frustrations of being stuck with people who love, but don't always like, each other makes "Vacation" connect on a personal level.The bad guys also kill the fake daughter before Charlie turns the money over to them.Surely, "Eternal" would be sleazy enough for a discriminating B-movie lover such as myself.It is as run of the mill as it gets.I thought it would show a little more imagination.It must be some producer's house.Once they get their hot tip on the compliant Slovakian ladies, the movie clearly illustrates the danger of taking travel advice from someone you just met.Although I didn't like the movie as a whole, there were still some good things here to enjoy.
Most of the sex scenes are brief and miss the point.
But these are just the best-known "National Lampoon" movies.